July 9, 2013

My views...

I love it when people share the sights they encounter when they run or bike or hike. Sometimes it's lovely, harmonious and natural vistas – trees, creeks, grassy hills and wildflowers. Sometimes it's an interesting, urban visual cacophony of traffic and neon lights and advertisements. It is #soinspiring to be transported to the places these people have experienced.

I didn't want my readers to feel left out of MY experience.

To that end, here's what I saw this past week...and what went on in my mind when I saw it...

Straight ahead.
"HOLY SHIT. I still have more than SIX MINUTES???
Thank GOD I have my #hydration bottle and my sparkly headband!
And #soblessed my iPod is fully charged!"

To my left.
"I really wish I had turned that fucking fan on.
Or that someone would walk by and I could ask them to do it.
I am SO glad I'm not next to that guy on the arm thingy elliptical...
all that commotion right next to me would make me want to puke.
And why do some of the machines have these water bottle holders?
Why do ONLY TWO have them? That's some bullshit right there."

On my right.
"I wonder if I need model releases for the people in these photos?
Probably not since I don't make any fucking MONEY off this shit.
I wonder if they'd be pissed to know I just snagged photos of them?
How can she stand to work out in that ginormous t-shirt?
Why can I hear the dude on the rower from HERE? JESUS.
Good thing I have a steady hand..."

Overhead view.
"This is what I would see if I passed out on the machine and came to
before the ambulance guys loaded me onto a gurney and carted me away.
Or if I had missionary-position sex while laying on top of the machine.
I wonder how many corrugated waves there are in the whole ceiling?
Do these skylights open?"
It's called "Stream of Consciousness."

And another 30 minutes of z2 on the elliptical in the books.

I'm not asking you any questions because you never answer them. It's hard to build a relationship when there's no communication. 

Where's the trust? 

I think maybe we should consider counseling. 


  1. I was all ready to answer your rainbow questions the other day but I was too distracted by The Bachelorette

    1. If you'd like rainbows, I can custom-make an embroidered rainbow throw pillow for you :)

  2. I love this post! But, I must admit, I hate running. And going to the gym. But hearing about You running at the gym? Awesome!

  3. No view straight down?! I call shenanigans. #showmeyourtitsofglory

  4. I was totally going to answer the shit out of whatever question you threw at us, but you've stumped me with that one. I DON'T KNOW.

    Poor ginormous t-shirt girl.


Say it. But if you can't own your shit, don't dump it on me.

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