June 18, 2013

Food, Drama, and a Gratuitous Ass Photo

I contemplated waiting until Monday before attempting to post something – going for a month between posts sounded like good spacing – but then I made something so fucking awesome for dinner that I had to take a picture of it and share it with the world.

No, it wasn't oatmeal.
Picture please?

To be quite honest, part of why I haven't posted in so long is that I am so ashamed of my abysmal oatmeal consumption – as well as the fact that I have not run (or done anything fitness-related) since...ummmmm...February? Wow. In fact, not only have I done nothing fitness-blog-worthy but I haven't even read a blog since forEVER. I have missed so much prime blog fodder – including IHOP's anniversary and the scandal at Jamba Juice.
So where's the fucking food picture?

Not sure why I hesitate to blog when I have nothing to say. That doesn't seem to deter other bloggers. Perhaps that's how they're able to blog every single mutherfucking day. Maybe I'll make July "Blog Every Single Mutherfucking Day No Matter WHAT" month.
Are you going to show us your fucking dinner pic or what?

Okay. Here's what I had for dinner –


Lunchmeat.

No nitrites or nitrates, of course.

With avocado, heirloom tomatoes, Micro Mix sprouts (kohlrabi, red cabbage, tatsoi, mizuna and arugula). Freshly ground sea salt and black pepper.

Chia optional.

And because all that stress really stressed me out and took away my appetite and made me lose about 10% of my body weight (see skinny ass below),



I finished the meal with a half-pint of high-fat, coconut milk-based ice cream. If you suffer from stress eating, I'd try upping the stress level to the point where you feel nauseated at the mere idea of food. Or we could try some stress-reduction techniques. But there's no drama in that – and we bloggers thrive on drama.

Do you have a dramatic life?

Do you have a skinny ass?

Have you ever been injured?

Do you ever find yourself blogging when you really have nothing worthwhile to say?

12 comments:

  1. This is the most courageous blog post I've ever read. You inspire me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I vow to up the courageousness of this blog by posting a photo of my ass naked next time.

      Delete
    2. I'M HOLDING YOU TO THAT.

      Delete
  2. Geez, that is one skinny @ss!! :)

    1. No
    2. No
    3. No
    4. No
    5. Yes

    ReplyDelete
  3. MILLLLFFFY! I was just here yesterday checking up on you. I willed you back. The blogs with nothing to say are the absolute best IMO.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I felt your cosmic energy aligning with my Blog Chakra drawing me back to the vortex of mindlessness...I mean mindfulness.

      Okay. You've inspired me to blog every single mutherfuckjng day for a month. Now I need to decide when to start.

      Delete
  4. Wow - you made me feel so much better about my lack of motivation lately. I feel almost inspired to do something constructive. I'm considering going to bed early(ish) so that I might have energy to do some exercise & not binge at night & maybe write a blog post.
    I am a stress eater. Learned that my wedding day & then relearned it after my son was born, in a big, big way - ah, memories of binging on Easter candy while rocking my colicky baby for hours on little sleep. The only time I have no appetite is when I have a bad sinus infection or I'm in the throes of a stomach virus.
    I hope whatever your awful stress has been, to bring you to a point of no eating, has passed. Not that I wish huge amounts of eating on you, but, you know.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. Thankfully, the massive stress agent has been 86ed from the building. I am eating again so I have boobs again. Hard enough to be a MILF Runner when you can't run, but take away the boobs and you've nothing left ;-)

      Delete
  5. That Ass of yours is amazing!!! ( but then you are " The MILF Runner"...) going to hold you to the next picture of your ass!!!

    Was injured in 1998 and didn't run for 9 month, no I didn't have a baby

    not big into sress, and would like a skinnier ass myself.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stop eating ---> skinnier ass. It's science.

      Delete
    2. Like food too much, maybe I need to run more...

      Delete

Say it. But if you can't own your shit, don't dump it on me.

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