NEVER STOP POSTING.
People will worry about you. They will be so sad. They NEED your post in their day.
Or is it that people nowadays have no attention span. They really don't give a shit about you unless you are all up in their fucking kool-aid every single day – favorite flavor or not.
Where have you been, MILF Runner? you ask.
Yeah! you say. And where are my mutherfuckin' socks, bitch? And that runner's lube shit?
Okay.
Answers.
I have a lot of kids, and they almost ALL GOT SICK last week. And then I got sick. It was puking and fever sick. Except for me. I am not a puker. I did enough of that freshman year in college to seriously last me a LIFETIME. I was lucky. Instead of vomiting, I got this totally rad rash with my fever. Needless to say, y'all were not a priority. And as much as it pains me to say it (not really), my kids come before this.
However.
Just because I'm not putting out doesn't mean I'm not thinking about putting out. Here's the first installment:

I'm sorry you got sick, and yes we have been worrying about you, but I don't want you to think that I'm stalking because you are after all still a MILF...
ReplyDeleteEverything's on the upswing :)
DeleteThis is like watching Grease on AMC at like two in the morning, but instead of wearing cool hoop skirts, satin jackets and motorcycle boots, you are wearing Lululemon yoga pants and Asics split leg shorts. Except Coach Dion. Because according to him he only runs shirtless.
DeleteI am glad you are back. Coach Dion is, too. Your comic strip forgot to debate arm warmers or not.
ReplyDeleteI had to stop somewhere due to formatting limitations ;-)
DeleteSorry to hear you (and everyone else) were sick but glad you back at it. I didn't have enough sarcasm in my day without your posts.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait to visit your babyblog in the next day or so :)
DeleteHooray! I thought I was being a bad blog follower for not being around to comment recently, happy to know we BOTH dropped the ball. Also, OMGAWD BOSTON!
ReplyDeleteomFg.
DeleteBet if you ate more protein (the freer the better) you wouldn't get sick.
ReplyDeleteI was hoping for the boob pic.
Definitely arm warmers for Boston. But no sparkly skirt. There's enough glam there as it is without
Would above-the-elbow evening gloves work better since it's all so terribly glam? Betty is really struggling with this decision.
Deleteok that last comment wasn't ready to post. I must've been jacked up on protein eggs.
ReplyDeleteI WAS worried about you. Bad blogger:) So sad that you guys were all sick, that sounds awful! Your comic is awesome!
ReplyDeleteI love how Brooke was so happy even while sick. And I sometimes sleep with my sunglasses on my head.
DeleteIs that because your future is so bright?
DeleteTalk about a short attention span... You jammed the myth of Boston, Greek yogurt, smoothies, sparkly skirts and a runner's God given right to be bat shit crazy into 3 frames. Well played.
ReplyDeleteHere's the cruel irony - I believe that the Boston Marathon dumps into Kenmore Square from Beacon, right? Well, there is a Jamba Juice about a half mile a way but one block over on Commonwealth. The only way you could hit it is if you Rosie Ruiz this motherfucker and dump off the course at Chestnut Hill and Commonwealth, take the "B" street car down to BU, get your smoothie on and then sneak back on the course at Kenmore Square.
PS Seriously, there is NOTHING better than using a proper name as a verb. Never gets old.
Or if you're a guy you could Kip Litton it.
DeleteTechnology makes this more and more difficult, as does wearing a sparkly skirt.