February 25, 2013

Socks Giveaway! Bonus topic: why I'm annoyed at DailyMile

Since no one sent in any questions for Mailbag Monday this week and I'm exhausted from my very busy weekend of soccer and playdates and music lessons and housework and NOT FUCKING RUNNING, I'm taking the Lazy Blogger path and just trying to jack my numbers with a giveaway. I'm really bummed there is no question this week. So get on it, y'all.

Used Free Shit this time around is

SOCKS!!!!!

Much like that used sports bra Micki won last time, these socks are in immaculate condition. I only wore them each one time. They were all too small for my size 8.5-9 womanly feet.


I've heard people LOVE these socks. They felt really good on my feet, but the stupid backs kept sliding down under my heels because my feet are just too big. When the fuck did that happen? I used to wear a 7.5, but I guess that was before I had kids. And before I had spent another 20 YEARS on my feet. Body changes, y'all. Embrace them. It happens to ALL of us.

Melissa has first dibs on which pair she wants since she was my tenth Facebook page liker (go like it now – who knows what kind of awesome shit you might win!) if she thinks they will fit her fucked up feet ;-) The rest of you clandestine readers can can enter this awesome giveaway simply by leaving a comment saying:

SOCKS! GIVE ME SOCKS! MY FEET ARE SOOOOO FUCKING COLD! 

Or something like that. But I'm not going to get that you want to enter telepathically, so you do have to leave a comment. So scary, I know.

About DailyMile.

WTF, DailyMile? Y'all shouldn't send this automated shit out to people because you never know what sort of NERVE it might hit.


Yeah, I really want to post my first fucking workout but

I'M INJURED, KELLY AND BEN. THANKS FOR RUBBING IT IN!

Fortunately, this week I'll be able to do some sort of exercise and then I can post my FIRST FUCKING WORKOUT, KELLY AND BEN – ARE YOU HAPPY NOW? Of course it will probably be a 5-minute walk and some weenie leg press. Which won't make ME happy. Or rather, as happy as I'd like to be.

How do you stop yourself from going crazy when you can't do something that's a very important part of your life?

First I watched all the Men In Black movies. Now I'm on the Die Hard movies. When I finish those, I'll move on the Bourne movies. Eventually, I probably work my way down to the Mary Kate and Ashley movies. If it comes to that, look for some wicked movie reviews and giveaways. Used #freeshit of the very best kind. Definitely good reasons to stick around ;-)

Edited to add: Guys, I feel like I'm totally letting you down with these seemingly sexist giveaways – all female items. But I am a woman so the shit I use is mostly women's. However –

1.5-ounces of slippery goodness

I found this once-used bottle of 2Toms SportShield! Guys can use this, right? So what if it's slightly unhygienic to share, the one time I used it was last fall, and I'm sure that if any cooties got on the roller ball they've long since died. Since I won't be doing anything chafe-inducing for quite some time, let's give this shit AWAY!!!!! Leave a joke in the comments that has to do with something slippery or slimy. Bonus entry if it could be deemed inappropriate for mixed company.

22 comments:

  1. i cannot even tell you how amazing this is. i'm slightly concerned that your socks (while too small for you) will be too big for my freakishly tiny feet. not to worry though, i'm sure that some slippery slimy sport shield will eliminate any potential blisters i'd get from wearing used oversized socks ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awesome! So you are entering BOTH giveaways :) GREED IS GOOD. Am I the only one old enough to remember Gordon Gecko?

      Delete
  2. Daily Mile is like Friendster, which though well dead at least in English speaking parts of the world was ultimately a bit cooler than Myspace - in other words, it's not the worst exercise tracking site, but close.

    Daily mile is basically the web based fitness tracking version of Up With People. So it doesn't surprise me that it's so popular. Like you seem to be, I'm not down with the motivational e-pokes from Lululemon wearing fitness losers named Kelly and Ben. Plus I like my shit dialed in with speed, cadence, watts, HR, feet climbed, etc. My understanding is that Daily Mile crashes if you attempt to put in a workout with a pace faster than 10 minute miles.

    Endurance sports have become so happy and sanitized and vanilla it makes me want to puke.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Patrick, this is very coincidental. Was just about to go for a 11 min/mi run in my lululemon pants ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That you were going to no doubt post on DailyMile ;-) But more importantly - are you wanting used socks or unhygienic SportShield?

      Delete
    2. For the record, Kelly gets a pass on Lululemon because I believe she gets that I am delivering my shit super dry. People either laugh or think I'm a douche - very little middle ground with me.

      Delete
  4. First of all, why do you still only have JUST 10 likes? I feel like I've let you down somehow. We've got to work on that.

    As for the socks, I am Asian, so this girl does not need more yellow in her life. For reals. Also, no one understands the concept of sorting colors or bleach for whites, so that white pair wouldn't last long. Not a racist call, really. So let's go with the green. Maybe they'll make me fast for my St. Patty's run?

    Off to question my peeps and demand they like you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Green for Asian St. Patty's Day. Gotcha.

      And yeah, what is UP with my lack of FB likes and lack of Twitter followers? I think people are scared to be associated with me. So chickenshit. My readers are awesome and NOT chickenshit. Or it could be the language.

      Delete
  5. I WANT ALL THE THINGS.

    P.S. kelly and ben emailed me and they think you're a whiny little bihatch.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have stated from the beginning that I do whine (see my ABOUT page). And I cannot for the life of me understand why in the fuck you didn't just say BITCH? Or maybe you were meaning they think I am a bisexual egg (referring to my avatar)? In any event, you've inspired my Etsy shop and just wait til you see my next craft ;-)

      Delete
  6. How do I keep myself from going crazy? I take out my frustrations on all the innocent people around me. Mostly by yelling at my husband and scowling at random people in the grocery store. Well, not really, I just focus obsessively on something else.

    I really like how you creatively unveiled your giveaway. The towel was a nice touch.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My innovation is sure to be widely copied. :)

      Delete
  7. Oh dammit no purple. I had Sportshield but it leaked all over the place. Mucho no bueno.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Purple? you like PURPLE? boy, have I got a giveaway for you! Coming soon. Stay tuned. Yeah, not so keen on the slippery mess that is SportShield :( But shhhhh...someone might want it.

      Delete
  8. Daily Miles also sent me a mail this morning and they though I had an EPIC week of training... well it was a rest week and I didn't really run much (sorry but I do understand that you are injured). So would can it be an EPIC week, I wonder what they are going to call this week when I double my milage!!!

    Now socks are always in need, and if they are too small for me I can get my wife to model them, she is madder than me and might only run 3 times a week 20-25km, but she's in the gym and on the bike the rest of the time... Oh she also swims, but she wouldn't need socks for swimming...

    With all this running in the family.... but if it leaks I don't know if we want to be sending SportShield to Africa...

    Just one thing on the last give-a-way maybe you should have a reportback from the winner!!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. This is by far the BEST fucking blog ever! I'm hooked. The anticipation is killing me for your next post.
    Even if I missed the sock give a way (those are the only socks I run in)
    You rock!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Just want to say your blog is fucking awesome! Thought I already posted this but.......

    ReplyDelete
  11. I didn't even know you had a FB page. I will be liking it!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Replies
    1. You SCOFFED!!! LOL

      And never messaged me your addy. I thought you didn't want them. Ooops! Okay.

      Experias are GONE. Giveaway is now for the Fox River socks or the SportShield.

      Delete
  13. You missed your opportunity for another blogger learning opportunity - namely, to include all the caveats about how non-Americans cannot win any of the things.

    Capitalizing on that, you should know that I am Canadian, have appropriately sized feet for this socks, want them, and that giveaways are (apparently) effective at getting lurkers out of the woodwork. Love the blog!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Socks....pah.... bunch of Jessies.

    ReplyDelete

Say it. But if you can't own your shit, don't dump it on me.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...